


Restroom

by Andwecanmessaround



Category: Sense8 (TV)
Genre: F/F, Self-Harm, Sun is a badass, street fighting sun bak, violence but nothing compared to what we've seen in canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-22
Updated: 2015-07-22
Packaged: 2018-04-10 15:02:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4396436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andwecanmessaround/pseuds/Andwecanmessaround
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Riley Blue is 15 years old and cannot help the rapidly growing attraction she feels to local bad girl Sun Bak.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Restroom

Riley Blue is 15 years old when she slits her wrists and Sun finds her crying, sitting on the floor in a bathroom stall when she’s supposed to be in a history class. They’re in the same year but they’ve never spoken more than a few words to each other before, and Sun doesn’t say a thing - not even _why?_ \- just opens her bag. But she treats Riley with care. The feel of the dark haired girl’s soft hands brushing the skin on her arms, as Sun helps clean the cuts and bandage them, make Riley shiver with something that feels like nervousness. She’s almost disappointed when Sun finishes and steps back. Like getting on a rollercoaster only to have it break down and stop just before the big drop.

“If they get infected go to a hospital.” Sun says, sounding almost bored. Riley wonders how and why Sun keeps a first aid kit in her bag, why she helped a stranger. Wonders how to ask these questions, because frankly Sun Bak intimidates Riley a little, with her silence and her hard stare.

Before she can even muster the beginnings of a question Sun leaves, ignores Riley’s hasty thanks called after her and doesn’t look back. Sun never mentions that event or approaches her again afterward. Riley sees teachers and parents turn to each other with hushed whispers, eyes wide with pity as Sun turns up alone to every school event. No one has ever seen Sun’s family. A black SUV with tinted windows picks her up after school and rumours circulate, becoming more and more wild with every retelling in the playground.

Sometimes Riley feels eyes on her, sees Sun’s sharp gaze sweep an area, lingering on her for a second longer before passing on. She offers a smile in the other girl’s direction sometimes, but Sun never returns it.  
____________________

Sun Bak is 16 years old and cannot remember a time when she felt like she fitted in her own skin. You look like your mother, she’s been told since she was old enough to understand those words. The woman who’d died giving birth to Sun’s younger brother thirteen years ago was never far from the lips of her father’s friends when they met the oldest Bak child. There were pictures of her mother and brother all over the house, although none of Sun, and the resemblance was clear on a basic level. The same long straight hair and heart shaped face, even the same nose. Sun felt like they couldn’t be more different. Even in photos her mother’s face radiated a peaceful joy, a sense of calm happiness in her eyes that Sun knew she could never achieve. Whenever people visited, Sun was in charge of entertaining them, and the guest would inevitably pick up a photo of her mother, and from there the comparisons would begin.

One of her father’s associates tried to touch her face once. She’d recoiled and pushed him in anger before she could stop herself and despite her profuse apologies the man had still severed a deal with her father. He drowned on a boating trip a week later, a seemingly calm ocean turning stormy overnight and dragging him and the other passengers down into thrashing darkness. She remembered looking out her window when she saw the news, seeing the flat surface of the water stretching out for miles in front of her, deceptively calm. When the other students at school stare, or look at her before turning to their friends to whisper, she can imagine waves crashing in her chest, can feel the anger writhing into spiky shapes that she pushes down. She feels anger physically just above her heart. Burning, searing, constant. Sometimes she burns herself to let it out, but never anywhere it will show, her father would be too upset if she marred her skin. After all - her mother had perfect skin.

She is not her mother, she will never be serene. Sun is burning wrath, buried under layers of ice.

A boy in school reaches under her shirt to try and undo her bra one day in maths, shortly after her sixteenth birthday, and all that forced calm and quiet shatters. She’s suspended for three days, and when she leaves the principal’s office the boy recoils against the waiting room wall in fear, a wad of bloody tissues pressed to his probably broken nose.

It could have been worse for him, should’ve been and would’ve been if not for slender fingers gently closing round her wrists. Riley Blue was fragile and her grip weak, Sun almost shrugged her off, but she couldn’t bring herself to hurt  the other girl to make her let go. There was something calming in the way Riley’s eyes held her own in a long stare. She’d never really noticed the other girl’s eyes before now - even though she felt permanently hyper aware of the girl’s existence since last year - they were a light hazel colour, big and open, ringed with eyeliner.  Riley didn’t let go until Sun was dragged away.

It’s the start of a change in Sun’s life.

The boy in her class has an older brother, and large friends. She breaks his nose again anyway when she overhears some girls talking about how he smashed Riley Blue’s iPod and made her cry.

She winces as she walks home, presses an ice pack to her swollen eye and passes out on the couch. Her dream is cut brutally shirt by one of her father’s bodyguards shaking her awake, and she quickly forgets most of it, but clings to the fake memory of Riley’s cool lips kissing her pain away.

She can still feel the phantom grip around her wrists.

Sun rebels, and when her father barely takes notice, she rebels in the only way which will hurt him. She grabs the kitchen scissors and hacks her hair short before she can change her mind. She will never be mistaken for her mother again. She burns her skin with her cigarette ash, drowns herself in alcohol and lets others make as many bruises on her skin as she makes on theirs. He notices, but still doesn’t seem to care. She gets a job at a bar and quietly arranges to move out.  


_______________________________

  
Riley Blue is 17 and her boyfriend – ex boyfriend - is an asshole. She wipes her tears away as she climbs up the fire escape to the roof, surprised to find there’s already someone else up here. Sun Bak is sitting on the edge of the roof, a silhouette lit by the soft glow of a cigarette.

She stumbles over the uneven surface in the dark a few times, probably the alcohol affecting her too - but she would never admit to being a lightweight - and sits beside her silent classmate. Sun passes her a cigarette without even looking at her and Riley feels for her jacket pocket finding only air. She curses to herself under her breath.

“I left my coat indoors do you think you could…?” Riley waves the unlit cigarette around in her hand, pausing to gasp as Sun turns to face her and she sees the bruise covering the left half of the girl’s face. Everyone knows Sun’s reputation as a fighter, but to see the physical evidence is still a shock. Sun has acquired an almost mythical status amongst her year group and the years below, particularly among the girls. She’s a professional street fighter now, winning brawls in underground clubs, and none of the boys in school would dare to harass a girl lest she find out. Riley tried to sneak in to a fight once, unwilling to afford the entrance fee, but she was quickly thrown out. It was worth it though, for the brief glimpse of Sun in a black tanktop moving lithely across the floor, free of that mask of neutrality. She moved with such deadly grace.

She’s so fucking cool. Riley can’t help but admit she may have fallen for the legend of Sun. She’s always hopelessly admired this tough, quiet girl. She can’t explain it, it’s like Sun is constantly at the back of her mind, always has been. Its a shock to remember that Sun can be hurt. Riley wishes she could run her fingers over the fighter’s cheek and wipe the pain and the purple away.

Sun reaches into her leather jacket and pulls out a silver lighter, leans over and touches the flame to the cigarette. Riley tries not to shiver too much, enjoying gazing at the city in silence, but after a while her teeth are chattering audibly even over the rush of traffic.

“You should go back inside,” Sun is looking at her again and sounding so bored, and Riley feels herself flush. Of course the other girl doesn’t want her here.

“I..can’t.” Riley admits, looking down at her hands “but I can sit somewhere else on the roof if you want me to go.”

“Why not?” a small inflection of worry tinges Sun’s voice, as well as a slurring, and Riley realises that Sun is actually really tipsy too, and shifts into drunk girl confession mode, shuffling closer to the other girl until their knees and hands are almost touching. Sun doesn’t move away.

“My boyfriend is down there with another girl.” Riley breathes deeply.

Sun waits for a moment to speak, taking a deep inhale and loosing a large cloud of smoke, tapping her ashes off on the edge of the roof as she replies.

“I could take care of him for you.” She says and Riley smiles a little, but shakes her head. 

“I know I should be upset, or angry, but…i’m actually a little relieved. ” her voice catches and Sun places her hand over hers - it’s covered in bruises and callouses, a warrior’s hand. It’s comforting. 

“I’m not upset because of him, I’m upset because i couldn’t make myself love him, and he loved me, and my parents loved him, my friends all loved him. He was perfect, and there’s something wrong with me because I tried so hard and I couldn’t make myself love him.” Riley can’t help but start sobbing, and Sun turns and lets Riley lean on her chest, wraps her arms around the blonde even. Riley doesn’t think she’s ever felt so embarrassed in her life, or so safe.

“Love doesn’t work like that. Emotions don’t work like that, you try to push them back and they spring back up from a different path, you try to drag them out and they hide. You can’t control your emotions, only choose how you act on them.” Sun says, with all the wisdom the vodka shots have apparently imparted upon her.  


“Isn’t that how you’re so calm all the time though? You push things down?”  


“I’m furious, all the time. I accept that. People are right to be afraid of me.” Sun feels her arms tense as she answers.

“I should have spoken to you after you helped me…I’m sorry, I used to be scared of you too.”  


“Used to?” Sun supposes no one would cry on someone they were scared of, but it was still odd for someone not to act afraid of her who wasn’t her father or brother.  


Having a father who runs a drug cartel tended to make teachers and parents skittish, and the kids at school had definitely picked up on that fear even when she was in middle school. Sun had always been the kid everyone avoided.

“You’ve done nothing but help me, you’re a good person. I wish I was as brave as you.”  


“You are,” Sun says, looking at the scars on Riley’s wrist.  


Riley looks up at Sun and offers her a thank you and a trembling smile. For the first time since they’ve met, Sun offers one in return.

____________________________

Sun Bak is 17 years old and is suffering for staying up late last night. The scent of blood and the atmosphere of excitement hangs in the air, her match begins soon, and she can’t get Riley _fucking_ Blue out of her head and just focus. She’s already lost the last two matches being distracted by thoughts of Riley Blue wrapping her arms around Sun as she cried into her shoulder. She hopes the boy who hurt her gets what he deserves.

She’s still not entirely convinced last night wasn’t a fantasy she’d concocted, but the scent of the blonde’s perfume still lingered on her clothes when she awoke- on her dingy mattress in her damp apartment still wearing last nights clothes - and she’d lent Riley her jacket. Sun tried to convince herself it was a selfless act but really she knows it’s so she’ll have a chance to see Riley again.

She doesn’t have to wait long.

When Sun is in the ring the adrenaline kicks in, everything is so much more focused and vibrant, though blurred at the edges. This is how the world is meant to be: simple. You know your opponents intentions and they know yours. Sun breathes, feels the energy in the air, sees her opponent lash out with his palm. Drop, centre low, legs wide, stable base. Punch. To the nose, opponent disorientated. Sweep. With your heel, bring his legs out from under him.

She presses her foot into his throat hard and he submits, the crowds cheer sounding muffled and distant. She looks up, and how can she miss the ethereal teenage girl at the front? She’s looking like a ghost in the blue lighting, mouth wide in excitement. They lock eyes and Sun feels like she’s buzzing with static. Riley’s wearing her jacket. Riley’s here.

She doesn’t know how she feels about that, and the adrenaline is messing with her inhibitions, but she knows how she feels about Riley and when the referee confirms her opponent is out she strides straight to the blonde girl, rests her arms on the waist high metal fence and leans over, then panics when she’s in front of her, realises she doesn’t know what to say. Riley smiles at her and she feels her mouth smile back of its own accord. She can’t pull herself away from staring at Riley, who can’t seem to break the eye contact either.

They’re both waiting, but in the end it’s Riley who makes the first move, to both’s surprise. She twines her fingers through Sun’s and brings the fighter’s hand to her lips, pressing her mouth gently against the bruised knuckles.

“You were amazing,” Riley says and Sun climbs over the barrier, let’s the blonde lead her to the bathroom and gently wash the blood from her cuts, presses damp paper towels to her scrapes and her lips against Sun’s own.

She’s surprised by how hesitant the kiss is, surely Riley doesn’t think _Sun_ would turn _her_ down? But she’s so stunned that she’s literally petrified, and Riley pulls away when Sun doesn’t respond to the kiss, stammering a hundred apologies. Sun puts an arm on Riley’s shoulder, slides it to the curve of the blonde’s neck and and pulls Riley in for a deeper, hungrier kiss. She thinks she probably tastes of blood, but then she’s past the point of self conscious. She’s being pressed up against the wall of a grimy public bathroom by a wispy blonde who’s barely an inch taller than her, and she thinks this is the greatest high she’s ever felt.

Some unlucky asshole opens the door to come in, but when Sun pulls back to open her eyes and glare at them they hurriedly leave back out the door, which bangs loudly shut.

___________________________________

Riley Blue is 20 years old and she glances in the rear view mirror at the city she’s finally leaving behind, before turning to grin at her girlfriend. She’s driving and as Riley places her hand on the gearstick, she feels Sun lay her’s on top with a reassuring squeeze.

They steal a glance at the bag full of drug money on the back seat together, and as they pull into a gas station for some snacks and some heavy make outs, Riley checks her hands for blood.

“I can’t believe you’re willing to do this for me,” Sun says as Riley opens the car door and gets out, she’s still sat in the passenger seat looking doubtful when Riley returns.  


“Look, snacks! Don’t worry about the cartel. And there’s no place I’d rather be than with you.” Riley says, dropping back into the drivers seat. Sun strokes Riley’s hair, admires the newly dyed blue streak. Riley leans into her.  


“Cheer up,” she whispers into Sun’s ear, as she slides a hand up the other girl’s thigh.

“They’re going to come after us,” Sun says.  


“Let them,” Riley replies with a hot, urgent, kiss which soon turns to them exploring each other’s bodies half naked in the backseat of their car, literally rolling in money when the bag spills. Riley lies on top of Sun as they relax, both giggling slightly with excitement and nerves.

Riley Blue and Sun Bak are 20 years old and they are on the run from a cartel. Sun Bak and Riley Blue are 20 years old and they are in love.


End file.
